Third-grade humor at its finest
2 February 2007 07:32 am![[personal profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/user.png){kind=small}
larryhammerJoke time! Answers behind the cuts.
Where was Moses when the candle went out? In the dark.
What kind of car did God drive? A Plymouth -- it says in Genesis, "He drove them forth in his Fury."
What did the Apostles drive? A Honda -- "They were all in one Accord."
What did David ride? "His Triumph was heard throughout the land."
One day Jesus says to his followers, "The Kingdom of Heaven is like 3 X squared minus 8 X plus 9." A new Disciple turns to Peter and asks, "What's that mean?" Peter says, "Don't worry -- that's just one of his parabolas."
(Okay, okay, I'll stop with the Biblicals and return to the riddles.)
What's green, fuzzy, has four legs, and would kill you if it fell out of a tree and landed on you? A pool table.
(Or maybe a billiard table -- hard to tell from below what they're playing up in the trees.)
What's yellow and dangerous? Shark-infested custard.
What lies on the bottom of the ocean and twitches? A nervous wreck.
What's your favorite stupid riddle?
---L.
Where was Moses when the candle went out? In the dark.
What kind of car did God drive? A Plymouth -- it says in Genesis, "He drove them forth in his Fury."
What did the Apostles drive? A Honda -- "They were all in one Accord."
What did David ride? "His Triumph was heard throughout the land."
One day Jesus says to his followers, "The Kingdom of Heaven is like 3 X squared minus 8 X plus 9." A new Disciple turns to Peter and asks, "What's that mean?" Peter says, "Don't worry -- that's just one of his parabolas."
(Okay, okay, I'll stop with the Biblicals and return to the riddles.)
What's green, fuzzy, has four legs, and would kill you if it fell out of a tree and landed on you? A pool table.
(Or maybe a billiard table -- hard to tell from below what they're playing up in the trees.)
What's yellow and dangerous? Shark-infested custard.
What lies on the bottom of the ocean and twitches? A nervous wreck.
What's your favorite stupid riddle?
---L.
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no subject
Date: 2 February 2007 05:20 pm (UTC)Q: Why does Santa have reindeer pulling his sleigh?
A: That way, if he crashes, at least he won't go hungry.
It put me on his good side. The benefits have lasted... oh, at least 16 years now.
no subject
Date: 2 February 2007 06:13 pm (UTC)---L.