Addendum to yesterday's post

[larryhammer]

Ninja Replacement Scores of Canterbury Tales, ongoing report:

Knight's Tale: If Palamon and Acrite were ninjas, there's two possibilities: either they'd immediately break out of prison, instead of waiting seven years, and the whole story never happens -- which is good if you don't like it -- or they'd see Emily before they had a chance and we'd get a ninja battle raging through and around the prison, instead of some joust in a tackily decorated list -- which would be awesome. The only problem is forcing the three prayers, particularly Emily's -- clever plotting is needed. I note, btw, that if Emily acted like the Amazon she supposedly is, she'd be functionally equivalent to a ninja. NRS = 2.

Miller's Tale: Cannot be improved by ninjas. Or by any meddling. NRS = 0.

Reeve's Tale: Since the miller's daughter is the only one who doesn't get into the wrong bed by mistake, she's the only one who could become a ninja without ruining our disbelief (hello, ninjas? darkness? -- totally their element) but the story wouldn't be improved thereby. Aside from adding opportunities for more dirty jokes, maybe. NRS = 0.

Cook's Tale: N/A -- not enough tale to evaluate.

Man of Law's Tale: Constance gets into trouble because everywhere she goes, some ninja comes along, kills someone (or one time, everyone), and frames her for it. I'm not making this up. And she just puts up with it. She SO needs to be a ninja herself. NRS = 1.

---L.

Comments

[stevendj.livejournal.com]

I started thinking about how many ninjas you'd need in Les Miserables, and the number just kept going up. I wasn't sure if Valjean and Javert need to be ninjas, but Marius and Cosette clearly do, because otherwise they're just insipid. If Marius is a ninja, then to maintain the proper relationship Valjean needs to be a better ninja, and of course the bishop he steals the candlesticks from has to be the best ninja of all. At this point Javert obviously has to be a ninja, and if you go all out with ninjas during the period of civic unrest, well, you could have an NRS in the hundreds.

[larryhammer]

That's the problem with big costume dramas that don't quite work.

---L.

[rymenhild.livejournal.com]

Apologies for the belated reply, but I only just read this.

What if you just let Marius and Cosette remain insipid? You could improve the story by ignoring them altogether while focusing on Valjean and Javert, who are clearly feuding ninjas. The bishop must have been the greatest of the ninjas before he entered the Church, of course, and now he's the wise old ex-ninja. NRS=3.

[larryhammer]

That ... works. Surprisingly well.

---L.