Tracing changing visions

[larryhammer]

First draft of 5 Nov 07:

These geese, flying south;
from these mountains and valleys,
I fold my own birds.

As posted 6 Nov 07:

Geese are flying south.
From mountain and valley folds
birds come to my hand.

Draft of 7 Nov 07:

Honkers flying south;
from the mountains and valleys
a bird folds to hand.

Draft of 8 Nov 07:

The honkers fly #$@^%#U*
argh ...

---L.

Comments

Re: maybe I'm allergic to geese?

[jamiam.livejournal.com]

except for the odd occasional V heading the other way.

Yeah, what's up with that? They just realized they left the oven on?

Re: maybe I'm allergic to geese?

[larryhammer]

That's what I wondered. Or maybe they'd left one of the chilluns on the stove.

---L.